Monday, September 17, 2007

Round Two: Fort Collins vs. Albuquerque, NM

If the premise for this contest were simply crime rate, it would end faster than Bob Saget’s rap career. According to data from the Uniform Crime Reporting (UCR), in 2005, Fort Collins had 37.9 reported violent and property crimes per thousand people. Albuquerque, on the other hand, had 71.15 per thousand.

To those who have visited both Albuquerque and Fort Collins, this should come as no surprise. For those of you who haven’t, allow me to break down these statistics in a way that is easier to comprehend—appearances on “COPS” the TV show.

Anytime I get homesick for Albuquerque, I just turn on COPS and watch as the high crime rate is documented and demonstrated in an entertaining fashion. Go ahead—give it a try! You might have to go back a few years, however, because Albuquerque mayor Martin Chavez banned the show from being filmed there. The basis: It was giving Albuquerque a bad reputation and hurting tourism. The reality: Albuquerque has a high crime rate—“COPS” was merely documenting this—and banning the show from filming the city doesn’t dispose of the statistics, it just hides them.

How many times has Fort Collins been on COPS? According to the Internet Movie Database, a big, fat ZERO times. I know. I know. Crime isn’t determined by the amount of times a city appears on COPS. However, this isn’t a featherweight fight where slaps are measured in actual statistical date. This bout that pits Fort Collins against other cities is a heavyweight brawl where blows are measured in abstract, intangible measurements that I judge to be important.

Therefore, the victory for round two goes to the town with fewer appearances on COPS: Fort Collins.

1 comment: